In his career, the Rocket has faced some tough opponents — Derek Jeter, A-Rod, Jose Canseco with a handful of sharp needles. But now Roger is facing his toughest foe ever — some dude in a robe.
Yep, he’s gotta face a federal judge for lying to Congress.
And when it’s all said and done, he could be spending some time in the judicial system’s version of AAA.
If you recall, some time back, the uber-muscular old man told Nancy Pelosi and her gang of ne’er-do-wells that he never took steroids. Turns out he did. And now Congress is pissed that he’s not an honest angel, like — ahem — they are.
Listen Mr. Clemens, you can get away with a lot of things in this country — just ask the cast of “Jersey Shore.” But one thing you cannot do is sit up on Capitol Hill and tell fibs. Congressman don’t take kindly to that sort of shit. Lying is only acceptable if young pages or hookers are involved. Other than that, you gotta be an honest injun.
So it looks like Roger will be standing trial. And then standing in line to get a body cavity search.
Sucks to be an ex-hero.


As most of you might know, the STBY World Headquarters is located in Cleveland, Ohio — former home of LeBron FUCK YOU James, who decided to go Art Modell on us and bolt town. At least he didn’t choose a whorehouse like Baltimore.
Take that, you tiny little country located in…hell… we have no idea where you’re located. You’re fucking Algeria, and we just KICKED YOUR ASS in the world’s most awesome sporting event (not counting the Super Bowl…and the World Series… and NASCAR).


Admittedly, we Americans don’t understand much about the game of soccer. The clock runs the wrong way. Time is added for no explicable reason. And there are never any cheerleaders. What gives, Mr. Beckham?
