It’s old news that Traitor James’s mom allegedly had a tryst with teammate Delonte West. But nothing quite articulates it like this commercial.

But still, he left. And in doing so, gave the entire city the finger on national television. Now, we Cavs fans have to suffer through another generation of losing.

To brighten all of your spirits, or just to tell LeFucker how you feel, we suggest that you go shopping for some new gear.

Our suggestion: The LeDouchebag wing of the STBY Gift Shop. Both styles pictured are available at cafepress. And all funds generated will go to The STBY Booze Fund, so we can forget the last 7 years of having a traitor in our city.

1-nil, baby.

Yeah, nil. That means ZERO in Algerian, you losers.

Now you know what it feels like to be the British in 1776.  It was a musket shot to the head, courtesy of Landon Fucking Donovan!

So, while you’re boarding your richshaw back to wherever the hell your country is located, we’re going to prepare for our next match. Or we might watch the NBA draft. That’s actually more interesting.

Jim Joyce, the first base umpire — Sucks to be blind.

The Walk Out of The Season HR

Physically speaking the home run trot  is one of the easiest athletic skills in all of professional sports. No risky slides into second. No head on collisions with catchers.

Think about it. If tubs of goo like Babe Ruth and Cecil Fielder could make it around the bases without landing in a wheelchair, pretty much anyone could do it. Except Angels banger Kendry Morales.

It seems that Kendry, after knocking a game-winning grand slam into Souvenir City, stomped on home plate so hard, he injured his knee. And now, he’s out for the season

Yes, he messed up his knees on a play that didn’t require him to do anything but walk.

Great to be the hero of the game. Sucks to be the victim of brittle bone syndrome.

Sure, Bobby Cox could have led the Braves to a couple more World Series rings during his tenure, but isn’t this cake a little too harsh for payback?

The good news is that the people who put together Mr. Cox’s little retirement party caught the icing-misspelling of his name on the cake before the man himself arrived. So to cover up the mistake in a hurry, they cut up a few pieces, passed them around and ate cocks.

The cake when it arrived to Bobby Cox's party.

Problem solved, just in time before the guest of honor arrived.

But this next rule is really perplexing. It appears that suffering a life-ending heart attack is against the rules. You see, recently, a 32-year-old Croatian soccer player named Goran Tunjic collapsed from a coronary in the 35th minute of a match. Thinking the player was merely taking a dive to draw a foul, the referee showed him a yellow card — a warning to behave the rest of the game.

Well, Goran behaved all right. After all, it’s sort of hard to commit any penalties when rigor mortis is setting in.

When the refs realized that Mr. Tunjic wasn’t faking his injury, it was too late.   He was rushed to a local hospital but could not be saved.

And while being dead might suck, at least Mr. Tunjic won’t have to play such a confusing game anymore.

Hai-ya!

Sheila Radziewicz is scheduled to take her black belt test in taekwondo next month at a martial arts center in Massachusetts. And during that test, if she indeed passes, she’ll invariably have to open up a can of whoop-ass and a pair of nunchucks on some poor schmuck with two arms. While Sheila, a.k.a. Badass Who Can Drive a Car With Her Feet While Putting on Makeup, has no arms and no kneecaps.

The only appropriate thing to do as a spectator watching a woman with thrombocytopenia-absent radius syndrome (TAR syndrome) beat her opponent into submission, well, is to give her a hand.

Allow us to gloat a bit. One of the owners of STBY hails from Ohio University. Yes, the lowly-rated Ohio University that took the big bad #3 seed Georgetown Hoyas and schooled them like a 5th grade CYO girls basketball team.

97-83.

Ouch, John Thompson III. That’s gotta sting a little. Letting a party school like OU kick your ass. It’s not often that elite basketball teams get booted by a bunch of beer-bonging bar hoppers. But it happened last night.

So on behalf of all the Bobcat faithful, thanks for giving us all another reason to get totally hammered.