We all know you shouldn’t drink and drive. Or text and drive. But apparently, not all of us knew you couldn’t do yourself with a huge honkin’ love toy and drive.
That’s what one woman was doing when an Elmwood Place police officer pulled her over for having tinted windows. (I think we can all guess why they were tinted now).
When cop went to ask the driver for her license, he saw a pantyless woman with a love toy dangling from her cooch, while her boyfriend in the passenger seat rolled hard core porn off the laptop.
Sucks to be that far from a bedroom.
The woman was cited for “inappropriate alertness” and “failure to find the G spot.”
It’s one thing to have your drunk roomie, your children or your mom walk in on you while you’re grinding uglies with your little lady. It’s quite another when a 
Altoids might want to change their slogan to 
At any given moment in New York City, you’ll find gun robbers, murderers and pimps destroying lives and making a shithole of the world. So, you’d think law enforcement would have their hands full. Right?
