Nice rack.

Ask fitness god  Tony Horton, and he’ll tell you there are a lot of different exercises you can do with a dumb bell. Curls, presses, flys.

Shtupping, however, is not one of them. For one Costa Mesa gym member, who got his own member caught in the hole of a dumb bell collar, that tidbit of information came a bit too late.

Apparently, the 50-year-old kinkmeister was using the weight to make his Johnson longer. What it actually did was make it wider — as in swollen. In fact, his package became so inflamed, that he couldn’t get the improvised cock ring off.

So not to panic, the man waited. And waited. And waited And waited for his little metallic girlfriend to be freed. After three days, with things starting to get a little uncomfortable and discolored, the man called in The Urban Search and Rescue Squad (and their saws) to help.

Sucks to have the authorities give you a hand job while every news affiliate in Cali is hitting “record.”

Our advice? Stop dating the weight equipment. Because if you think it’s bad when it breaks your dick, just wait till it breaks your heart. That pain, my friend, never goes away.